The 8 Signs Of A Total Facebook Addict

Image: Michael Mandiberg

Facebook is addictive. Or rather, checking Facebook to see if any notifications is addictive. Once it gets hold of you, it will never let go. The following list is a compilation of signs that you should look out for in your Facebook habits. Facebook addiction can happen to anyone.

1: You tell other people about what happened on Facebook because they can’t see your friend’s updates

“Man, the funniest thing happened the other day. Joe was like ‘urgh’, and then Steve said ‘what’ and then the other Joe didn’t know about the thing and I commented and she liked it. AWKWARD”

Thank you for that. I feel my life is enriched with the knowledge I have just learned. Such prophetic words.

2: You start checking into places even though they aren’t registered on places with Facebook.

Rachel checked in at ‘that patch of grass by the library (not the one with the tree, the other patch by the water fountain)” –

Thanks, now I know exactly where to avoid.

3: You are logged into Facebook on more than one device at a time

You are logged onto Facebook on your desktop computer but still check on your phone out of habit. It happens to the best of us. It’s just a healthy craving for some more notifications.

4: Someone says something and you agree with what they say, so you just say ‘LIKE’ in an inappropriately loud voice. Embarrassing.

But secretly you wish that you could ‘like’ something out loud in real life. It’s so much easier to have a blanket emotion to cover all eventualities.

Image: Nate Bolt

5: The word “Facebook” no longer has any meaning to you. It’s just a normal word. Now you think about it, it’s like a book full faces. But it’s not a book (remember those?). It’s on the Internet. Amazon is a river. Google it.

6: Instead of Googling the answer to a question, you post it on Facebook. This is fine for general local questions, or questions addressed to your friends themselves, such as who your friends think would win out of a pirate and a ninja, but questions regarding the effectiveness of Microsoft Lync 2010 in a dynamic business environment should probably just be Googled.

7. You forgot that you can log out of Facebook. All of your devices are constantly connected to Facebook and you receive instant notifications of any activity you weren’t even vaguely related in. It’s hard for you to comprehend that Facebook is a website. But it is, and it always will be.

8: You shared this post on Facebook before you even finished reading it! – QUICKLY! People must know! You can be the first to tell them!

If you have experienced any of the symptoms on the list then you may be in need of some professional help, for which you can probably ask about on Facebook. If you have any other symptoms, please list them below so that we can help in your diagnosis.

James Duval is an IT specialist, gaming addict and enthusiastic tech blogger. He writes for Intercall Europe about his journey through the magical wilderness of the Internet.